Conflict doesn’t have to produce a winner and a loser. In divorce, believing that it does can deepen the pain of separation and cause lasting harm — especially to children.

Separation and divorce are nearly always a painful chapter in the lives of parents and children. Unfortunately, that pain is only worsened when parents enter their new arrangement believing that conflict can be resolved only by defining a “winner” and a “loser.” In my experience, this belief is one of the most damaging — and most common — sources of relational harm overall. Nowhere is that harm more frequently inflicted than in divorce litigation, where an adversarial process built around winning can turn two people who once built a life together — and who will most often continue to share responsibility for their children — into opponents and enemies.

Mediation starts from a different premise: that parents can reach an agreement without resorting to a win/lose approach — one that models respectful and productive conflict resolution for their children, while helping parents build a new relationship of collaboration on their children’s behalf.

A marriage may end; with children, a family does not. It just changes its configuration.

Mediation enables even an initially antagonistic couple to begin constructing that new configuration together. Through the process, parents can develop a template for collaboration that makes future modifications — both small and substantial — easier to negotiate as circumstances and their children’s needs change.

I am a certified mediator trained at Harvard Law School. I bring to that training decades of clinical experience working with family systems, giving my approach a perspective that extends beyond a primarily legal framework. I can call upon my clinical understanding of challenges in communication and of the emotional complexity of relationship ruptures — for the adults involved as well as for children at different developmental stages. True empathy for all parties is often required to help separating couples move past their obstacles to collaboration. And it is collaboration that forms the basis of successful mediation.

I offer a limited number of family mediation appointments for divorce, custody, and other parenting disputes through my Center for Collaborative Parenting.

Mediation produces an agreement — but that agreement still needs to become official, and couples shouldn't have to navigate that step alone. At the end of the process, I provide a Memorandum of Understanding (MOU) reflecting what you and your co-parent or spouse have agreed to. From there, a family attorney in your state handles the legal paperwork needed to file that agreement with the court.

If you don't already have an attorney, I'm glad to help you find one.

As a member of the Association of Family and Conciliation Courts, I have access to a national network of family law professionals who understand and support the mediation process, and I can help connect you with one licensed in your state.

No fees are ever exchanged between attorneys and mediators for these referrals — my only goal is helping you find someone who supports the process and practices where you live.

Mediation is not a reimbursable medical service and is scheduled and billed separately from my clinical practice.

Kindly contact me by email if you would like to discuss whether mediation may be appropriate for your situation. Those wishing to refer clients are also welcome to contact me.

The cost of mediation services is $400 per hour. Review of records and documents, as well as telephone contact and collaboration with other involved professionals, is billed at the same rate. Appointments missed without 24 hours’ notice are billed for the time booked, with the exception of true emergencies